I dropped by our daughter's house yesterday to help her decide about an entryway rug. It was so good to see the family since these days the visits are few. The grandchildren were happily riding their bikes on the driveway and drawing raceways with colored chalk. They've been having more imaginative childhood play away from scheduled afternoon activities while they wait out the Covid-19 days. They homeschool, so mornings haven't changed much, but I know they're looking forward to getting back to being with friends at church and soccer and gymnastics and drama class and swimming and co-op gatherings and club meetings and overnighters with Nana and Grandad and .... I know I long to get back to some activities myself, but this has been a good time to consider how important each of those activities actually are. What do I really need to be doing? What do I miss doing? What have I done instead? Which is more fruitful?
I think this down time is an especially opportune time for parents to reconsider their children's activities away from home. Do these activities pull the family apart or bring them together in a good way? I know that sometimes getting children involved elsewhere helps developmentally, but are all the activities needed to accomplish that? It's good to ask ourselves what the goals are with the activities we might have each of our children going to. And what does each activity take away from them as they spend time at it?
When our children were seven and ten, we had a two-year temporary assignment several states away. Most of what we were accustomed to doing was left behind. The girls and I needed to rebuild our daily life. Their dad's days were pre-programmed with work, but the girls and I had to make our own way. We found that it was good, though, to go back to the foundation and stack the bricks with what was truly important at that time. It happened again two years later when we returned from the temporary assignment. This change forever changed how we did family life. Those were the beginning of the teen years, years that I could have lived in forever. Children grow into teens who become young adults, and off they go. If we hadn't had that last opportunity for change, we would not be who we are today. Sometimes it's good to just be able to start over.
The time may soon be approaching (hopefully so!) when families will be free to start over. We're told that the start-over will begin slowly. I pray that families will take the opportunity to consider what is truly needful for their family. Undoubtedly, it will be some of the previous activities. But, perhaps, it might not be all of them.
For the children's sake.
